Wow, it looks like people in the Trump orbit plan to enrich themselves in their positions. Who could have guessed? We’ve already seen Boris Epshteyn, who wants people to pay him – substantially – to put in a good word with Trump for a job. Now we get Elon, who, let’s face it, needs an infusion of cash in order to make it through the week. Sometimes, he’s the richest man in the world. ALWAYS, he “needs” a little more. To my mind, that’s the same mental illness that makes a person weigh in at 600 pounds…

You see, thanks to conservative deregulation, the larger internet providers have been buying up many of the smaller providers and making decisions about where profits can be mined and where there just aren’t enough people to justify certain expenditures. It’s the corporate way. Because of those calculations, the large internet providers won’t lay fiber optic cable in some areas. Not enough return on their investment.

So, the Biden administration put together $42.4 billion dollars to help rural communities hook up to various high speed internet systems through smaller, local services the large services haven’t swallowed – yet. Elon’s Starlink program didn’t qualify. It’s too slow. So, naturally, Elon thinks the program should be shelved. I mean, he doesn’t qualify, why should anyone qualify, right? Sure, he could have tried to speed up his system to meet the requirement but that would be hard so, better to just eliminate the requirement.

Fortunately, the areas that won’t have that zippy broadband because Elon sees a great place to cut funding will still have access to Elon’s crappier Starlink service. Oh, and it should be noted that as people sign up, the service is getting even crappier…er…slower. Do you see any problems with the idea of a richie-rich guy – a guy who can never be satisfied, a guy who only understands ‘more, more, more’ – having control over the fortunes of his competitors?

Ah hell, who knows, maybe he’ll be visited by three ghosts, here, pretty soon…

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Trump ran on, among other things, a promise to impose backbreaking, VERY destructive tariffs on pretty much everybody. Some of the countries he has mentioned specifically, have pushed back, announcing that if Trump DOES invoke his ill-advised tariffs, they would do the same. Let the trade war begin, right? Fortunately, Trump has been having phone calls with these countries and now has an excuse to NOT impose those crippling tariffs.

He can just tell MAGA that he got on the phone with these people, talked real tough to them, and they collapsed in the face of his awesomeness so now the tariffs won’t be necessary. The truth, of course, is that his entire campaign was a lie and no tariffs were ever necessary so what he needed was an excuse. Now he pretends his phone calls have solved the problem even before he took office and conservative media will support that story like it’s true and MAGA will eat it up with a spoon.

But at least he may not impose those tariffs, aggravating inflation and sending the economy into the tail-spin he managed during his last maladministration. He’ll find another way to crash the economy, you just watch…

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I haven’t been writing about the NFL as much as I expected to this season. That’s mostly because my Niners suck…er…I mean, ‘are struggling…’ this season. But the thing that is making the game almost unwatchable? Effing penalty flags! Oh! Em! Gee! It’s gotten SO bad, if two plays happen consecutively without a flag, it’s astounding. (I’m not sure it has happened even once this season, two consecutive plays without a flag…) Sometimes the broadcaster goes back and shows the violation and it’s clearly a good call. Sometimes the broadcaster goes back and shows the “violation” and it’s clearly NOT a good call. Sometimes, they don’t even show the problem. The game just moves on. Slowly. Oh, my gods, so slowly…

I continue to believe the NFL is manipulating the outcomes of games via their officiating crews. It’s likely more a matter of point shaving and beating the spread than dictating winners and losers but it STILL helps fortify their “investment” into ‘FanDuel,’ the online gambling site with which the NFL has “partnered” to take your money.

Not to put too fine of a point on it, if you think you’re “betting” on NFL game outcomes, you’re not. You’re really just posting how much money you intend to gift the NFL today. Don’t be an idiot. NEVER “bet” in a situation where your “bet” is controlled by the group who stands to profit if you lose.

But, hey, at least the Niners don’t have to contend with Head Coach Matt Eberflus, the Head Coach of the Chicago Bears. No. Strike that. The EX Head Coach of the Chicago Bears. That guy. The other day, I watched, perhaps, the greatest single failure of coaching I think I’ve ever seen -hyperbole is very big in sports – and it was all on Coach Eberflus.

All he had to do was line his team up for a field goal attempt to tie the game and send it to overtime, giving his Bears a reasonable chance to win. His Quarterback got sacked, making the field goal a greater challenge, but there was still time on the clock and he still had a timeout. ANY other team would have tried to position the ball a little closer then taken their shot at the field goal. Eberflus…did something else.

He very carefully used up the time left on the clock and then ran a desperation play that failed as time ran out, losing the game by three points. You can read that sentence over and over and, if you know the game, it will never make any more sense than it did the first time you read it. But that IS what he did. The team ran back to the locker room after losing with that timeout in their pocket. It was one of the most amazingly bad clock management moments in the history of the game. And the Bears agreed, parting company with Eberflus the next day.

Some guys just never make it as Head Coaches and I believe Eberflus is one of those. I wonder how many people in Chicago will forever refer to him as “Everflub…”