An Open Letter to Bill Maher…

Bill…can I call you Bill?  Oh, okay, Mr. Maher, then.  I watch your show every week.  I’ve been a fan going all the way back to ‘Politically Incorrect’.  We don’t always agree but then, it would be weird if we did, wouldn’t it?  As it happens, we agree on many things.  I share your outlook on Marijuana.  I share your feelings on political correctness.  I’m a Progressive.  Like you, I’m an atheist.  We agree more than we disagree but I’ve got to tell you; on the subject of Islam, I’m beginning to be concerned about you.  It appears your emotions have overwhelmed your rational mind on the subject and the situation seems to be getting worse.  On your March 24, 2017 broadcast, you became more emotional than I’ve seen you on the subject since Ben Affleck called you a racist.  For the record, I think Mr. Affleck was wrong – over the top.  But now it looks as though your own emotional involvement has caught up with Ben’s energy.

You swatted away comparisons to Christian outrages as “false equivalents” without first giving them any consideration.  Just, “No”.  And you seemed really angry.  Your position, if I understand it correctly, stands on two legs: violent acts of some people who are Muslims and polls.  I’m asking you to consider a couple of thoughts on those subjects that seem to have evaded you for the moment.  One, there are no atheists in foxholes and, two, polls are inherently biased and often, spectacularly wrong.

As to the first point, it seems most important to me that the “Muslims” who intend harm to America and Americans – aside from the occasional sympathizers who spring up from around the globe – all come from pretty much the same place and it cannot be a coincidence that the place they come from shares a common history of oppression and repression at the hands of “the West”.  (Specifically, Great Britain and the US.)

Simple math makes clear this is not a problem of Islam.  The Pew Research Center estimated that in 2010 there were 1.6 Billion Muslims in the world.  The Syrian Observatory for Human Rights estimates the size of ISIS’ forces at somewhere between 80,000 – 100,000.  That works out to .00625% of Muslims actively fighting.  That means that 99.99375% of Muslims are NOT trying to kill Americans.  Suggesting that six thousandths of one percent of any given population represents the entire population seems…specious at best, particularly when those that do mean us harm share a far more common thread: the vast majority of them come from places where the US has “projected her strength”.

When a people who have been subjugated, demoralized, and exploited for four and five generations finally declare they’ve had enough and begin to fight back, the oppressors might well attempt to demonize them as “terrorists.”  It’s common, in fact.  But one man’s terrorist is another man’s freedom fighter.  Either way, it’s war and war is insane.  It’s a well-known fact that in the insanity of war, fighters will turn to anything – anything – that might help them make sense of the events they’re experiencing.  They might even turn to their invisible super-friend for help and support…because there are no atheists in foxholes.  It just happens that in this case their invisible super-friend is named “Allah” and not “God”.  I submit that desperately grasping for hope from one’s religion is NOT the same as fighting for or because of that religion – even if the optics of the fight have been usurped by religious fanatics…

Ah, but you’ve got polls.  The polls you point to indicate that Muslims the world over support the tenets of Islam.  Let’s set aside the obvious problems inherent to polling like who did the poll?  What was the methodology?  How large was the sample?  Let us instead cut to the most basic difficulty of polling – and I feel funny even saying it because I know you know: when it comes to polls, people lie.  On every subject from sexual practices to sugar – people lie.

When a question of executing a heretic is nothing more than an abstract concept, people will often give the answer they feel they “should” give.  I suspect the poll findings would be very different if one restricted the poll respondents to people about to lose their own child to execution for “disrespecting the Prophet”.  Maybe not.  For sure, there are extremists in every religion.  But I’d bet there is a difference between an abstract concept and an actual reality in most cases…

So I’m asking you – as a friend – all right, no, as a fan whom you’ve never met, to take a step back and reconsider your position from a more…pragmatic perspective.  Do it for fairness.  Do it for honesty.  Do it for your health.  Carrying around that kind of energy is pernicious…

Beams and Motes, Logs and Specks…

I read that Patrick Kennedy has been asked not to receive “holy communion” in a row with a Catholic Bishop over his stance on abortion.

Really?

Do you suppose the Catholics are worried about the falling number of young boys available for molestation?  For my money, the Catholic Church has the exact same “moral authority” as NAMBLA.  Do you suppose the church has taken the same stance toward its pederast priests?

You hypocrite“, Jesus said, “first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.”  (Matthew, 7:5)

Maybe someone should introduce the Catholic Church to the teachings of Jesus…

Start A Tax or Start A Church…

I have to confess: I’m a little jealous of the business model of churches.  I know, they got in early so they got the really plum model, the one all businesses have been trying to re-create ever since.  Still, they’ve got it pretty sweet…

People voluntarily stop by the retail outlets (aka, “church”) once a week to make another payment on the installment plan in an effort to acquire a “product” the church never has to actually produce (immortality).

How much does their product cost?  They never say, at least not in absolute terms but 10% seems to be the going rate.  Now, that’s 10% of the gross, not the net and don’t cheat!  (God will know.  He knows everything…)

Man, what a great racket…

Even better, it’s common for churches to try and get their front-line employees to take a vow of poverty.  Just imagine owning a business in which the employees ask you to pay them as little as possible.  Think of what that does for the bottom line.

Sweet…

Still, I don’t think it’s “business model envy” that leads me to the position that it’s time Americans reconsider our stance on taxing churches.  Now, I’m only talking about property tax, here.  Churches like to pretend they use the donations collected to do “good works” around the world.  But they keep a lot of that money.

I’m ok with letting churches write-off what they don’t keep, that is, whatever actually gets used for “good works”.  It’s not the attack on religion it may seem.  It’s more like “holding them accountable”.  If you collect money on the premise that you’re going to do “good works” and then buy a shiny golden calf…er…cross with Jesus hanging on it (or any other kind of idol…) well, you’ve sort of collected money under false pretenses, haven’t you?

The state could use the money the churches are hoarding and even JESUS said, “Grant unto Caesar that which is Caesars”…

…failing that, I’d like to announce the formation of my brand new church, The Church of Universal Understanding!  The “understanding” of course, is that you send the Church of Universal Understanding – me – money.  I’ll use it for “good works”.  Well, most of it.  Ok a lot of it.  Well, some, for sure.  Er…define “good works”.

Don’t I need someplace to minister to my flock?  Shouldn’t it be someplace that glorifies the Lord?  I mean, you can’t ask the Holy Father to sit his Holy Butt on an unheated toilet seat, can you?  More, I’ve heard He really gets into a “smiting” mood if He’s asked to wash His Holy Hands under anything less than solid gold fixtures.

So, please…keep sending those tax-free donations.  The very moment my new, 32,000 square foot Palace-that-Glorifies-the-Lord-but-I-get-to-live-in  is complete, we can get some really “good works” done…