Equifucked…

Equifax, the credit reporting agency that tells lenders whether or not you’re dependable enough to receive a loan, has been breached in a data hack.  Yeah, modern times, these things happen.  Well, except these defenders of accountability were hacked in…May.  The company finally realized it in July – the 29th to be exact – and promptly made the announcement of same in August.  But in the meantime, three executives sold off a bunch of stock.

“Oh,” the company assures us, “those executives had NO IDEA the company was about to experience a downturn in stock prices associated with the revelation of the hacking because they didn’t know about the hacking.”  Really?  One of those executives was the Chief Financial Officer, John Gamble.  I’m supposed to believe the CFO wasn’t informed of events within the company that were definitely going to have such a significant impact on the financial operations of the company going forward?

Not buying.

“Well, then, er…um…okay, but it was only a million dollars worth of stock the guy sold.  Why,” asks the company, “would he sell off such a small chunk of his Equifax holdings if it was insider trading?”  Well, could it be because it was an unscheduled sale?  (It could.)

I think we should let Martha Stewart be the final arbiter of the deal.

Speaking of arbiters, Equifax is offering credit monitoring for a whole year!  You’re just supposed to forget the fact that the hackers have your vital information for…EVER!  Oh, and if you accept the “free” monitoring, the fine print includes an “agreement” from you that you won’t sue or join a class-action suit.  Nice…

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